Immensity.

Immensity.  When I stare out at the ocean that’s what I think of.  An unusual amount of vastness that consumes so much of our world, but yet can create something so serene and so peaceful.  To me at times life can seem as if it is full of immensity.  So many faces, so many people, so many problems, so much to face as we go throughout life.  It can seem overwhelming at times.  I can feel as if I don’t matter, as if I am just one out of over seven billion people on this planet and that I won’t make a difference because I am just one person.  These thoughts and doubts at times can consume me and make my dreams seem impossible.  I have this fear of being normal.  It can sound weird at first but I guess what it comes down to is that I don’t want to just be another face, another person, and another name that has no meaning to it.  This fear is what drives me to go after what I want in life.  Before a few weeks ago I filled my head with doubts instead of dreams and didn’t let myself think outside of the box.  I attended a discover your dream seminar hosted by the incredible Bob Goff and what I realized is that I don’t dream enough.  Bob is so filled with God’s love and excitement for life that it inspires me to want to be that way.  I don’t want to let the world’s problems diminish my passion for life but to simply motivate me to live my life more.  Life moves in the blink of an eye, it is always changing, sometimes for the good, sometimes for the bad, but it is what we make of it that matters.  So instead of looking at life as being overwhelming immense, I choose to now see it as a challenge that I want to conquer.  To go out and make a difference, travelling to areas of crises and using God’s love and gifts he has given me to spread his love and comfort to those on the toughest days of their lives.  Loss, grief, pain, at times their immensity can seem never ending, because for a long time I felt that way.  As if the immensity of pain would never cease to end.  But now I find God is using that immensity to change me and that as I continue to travel through it, I realize I am changing for the better.  God is making me new, making me whole again, and my passion for life is returning at a level it has never seen before.  Immensity.  Yes it can be scary, but I choose to embrace it and go after it.  And I can’t wait to see where God takes me next.